我們常說女生照顧小孩很辛苦,很容易有產後憂鬱。但,你知道你的老公也有可能產後憂鬱嗎?他們跟你一樣愛小孩,一樣想積極參與育兒的生活,但因為種種因素,他們無法像你一樣熟練,他們無法哄嬰兒睡覺、小孩哭鬧只要媽媽,被各種嫌棄,新手爸爸也很挫折。

 

source:stocksnap

根據《美國醫學會雜誌》的報告,從妻子懷孕的前三個月到孩子出生6個月,全世界有10%的男人表現出憂鬱的跡象,在嬰兒出生後的3~6個月,這數字急升到了26%。2014年的《Pediatrics》中也提到,在小孩5歲之前,新手爸爸的憂鬱症提升到了68%。SadDaddy.com的網站創辦人Will Courtenay博士說:「美國有1/4的爸爸都有產後憂鬱,他們都需要協助。」

 

先前妞編輯介紹的以色列插畫家Devir就曾在一幅插畫裡展現出他脆弱的一面。

 
 
 
在 Instagram 查看這則貼文

YEHUDA DeVIR OFFICIAL(@jude_devir)分享的貼文 張貼

It's OK
It's okay when she cries in your hands
It's okay that she only wants her mom
It's okay that you can't put her to sleep
It's okay that you still don't understand your status
It's okay that you don't have that connection, that everybody is talking about
It's okay that you still don't understand your job definition
It's okay that you don't make her laugh
It's okay that you're tired
It's okay that you're angry
It's okay that things don't work out for you
It's okay to ask for a hug
It's okay to share your partner with everything you go through, even if it doesn't seem so manly
It's okay that your life has changed
It's okay that your plans have been canceled
It's okay that you have no time for anything
It's okay to feel weak
It's okay to be moody
It's okay to feel lonely
It's okay to ask for help
It's OK...

 

source:stocksnap

面對新身份的轉變,媽媽要時間適應,爸爸更是需要花更久時間才能習慣。在初期他可能笨手笨腳地想要幫忙,卻被興奮過了頭的長輩擠擠擠,擠到最後排,又或是被心急焦慮的媽媽嫌棄,直接抱走自己來。原本最熟悉的家人、伴侶,忽然都離自己遠去,圍繞在那個小小半獸人上。

 

source:stocksnap

除了被家人排擠、在家中找不到自己的定位,經濟壓力、生理上的疲勞也是其中一個因素。家裡多了一張嘴要吃飯、老婆可能又請育嬰假,家裡的經濟重擔全在他身上;下班回家後可能還要照顧妻子小孩,無法好好休息,也是導致憂鬱症的其中一個因素。

 

source:stocksnap

如果我們常聽到老公喊累、頭痛、不舒服,這些都有可能是老公產後憂鬱的傾向:

1.常有煩躁、容易生氣等情緒

2.覺得自己毫無價值、沒自信

3.對性生活興致缺缺

4.濫用酒精

5.花很多時間在工作上

 

source:stocksnap

因為性別刻板的關係,男性常常不願意向別人坦露自己的脆弱,因此更容易被人所忽略。老婆們除了關照小孩之外,也可以多花時間和老公聊聊天,紓解他的壓力,給予老公支持與肯定,就算老公笨手笨腳的幫忙,也要多鼓勵!偶爾也可以把小孩交給信任、親近的親友照顧,夫妻好好約個會、維繫一下感情。

 

source:stocksnap

家裡有了新成員,有很多方面需要調整,尤其對新手爸媽而言,更是需要專業人士或親友的幫忙。為了家庭的和樂,記得千萬不要逞能,媽媽手冊、寶寶手冊都有24小時的求助電話,大家都可以好好利用喔~

 

 

 

 

媽媽苦但媽媽說不出?快來加入私密社團「媽媽妞真心話
一個屬於媽媽們的交流小天地,讓媽媽們盡情問問題、找答案、分享喜怒哀樂吧~

 

 

 

 

Source: Parent,Postpartumman